Rachel Rowland

A blog about life, leadership and whatever else lands in my lap.


August 26, 2015

On the morning we left I woke early. I couldn’t handle the impact of my emotion. I felt strong but I needed to be alone to work out what to do with it. So I went to the bottom of the garden and wrote this message to myself:

I am open.

I am receptive to whatever this exp...

August 15, 2015

What an intense weight of emotion. It’s stinging my eyes, squeezing my chest, sitting heavy in my heart and weighing my face down.

I am happy. I know I am. I feel calm on the inside. But my edges are frayed. My shell is worn thin. I’ve nothing left to fortify myself wi...

August 10, 2015

Home is where the heart is. Right? Well my home has just been packed into 365 cubic feet of shipping cargo and 11 very large bags. And it’s hurting my heart.

A few weeks ago I wrote about ambush goodbyes – the intense experience of realising that I won’t see someone aga...

August 4, 2015

Yesterday was a massive day. I didn’t realise it at the time, but today I can feel the impact. 

We sent our stuff for shipping. Our house is practically empty now. We have 3 beds, 1 sofa, and a table left to go into storage. And we have some toys, 2 mugs, a few plates...

July 28, 2015

We had our leaving party this weekend. Today I’m leaving work. Tonight I’ll leave some of my closest friends in London. The leaving has started.

Generally I find it very hard to identify how I feel about it. When I know I’m going to say goodbye to someone my body seems...

July 18, 2015

I feel wild in my soul. Like all the binds and ties I’ve been building and nurturing for years are loosening.

I’m listening in a different way. Despite the overwhelming amount of admin surrounding me, I’m ignoring a lot. I’m the most reckless and carefree I’ve ever bee...

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