Butterflies For Brains

Today I have butterflies in my tummy and an empty space where my brain used to be.

Sometimes it flips over. Thoughts flutter through my mind like butterflies and a hollow feeling rests in my tummy.

We’re about to get on the plane to visit Seattle.

It’s like a dream sequence. I’m watching someone else’s life. I have no children with me to root me into reality (thanks Mum). No work pressures to preoccupy my mind – that’s becoming a familiar feeling since I resigned. I have nothing to plan; it’s already done to a detail. I am no longer anxious that the opportunity will be taken away from us. The lawyers have confirmed today, in the knick of time, that the visa is on track.

We have permission to fly. And the butterflies are going for it.

I’m somewhere between giddy excitement and nervous jitters. A mixture of holiday high and business efficient, with a blend of carefree and overwhelming scale thrown in. Very bizarre.

This must be what freedom feels like. I think I’m going to enjoy this ride. Seattle here we come.